How Much Did You Sacrifice to Survive?

Unpacking the quiet compromises gay men make to stay safe - and how to start reclaiming what was lost.

Coming out is often framed as a destination - a crossing of the finish line. But what’s less discussed is the toll taken en route.

For many gay men, survival has meant more than silence or secrecy. It’s meant a slow erosion of self. Micro-adjustments. Tiny edits. A constant recalibration of tone, behaviour and expression to fit into a world that, for the…